“Papa kehte hain bada naam karega, beta hamara aisa kaam karega,” quadie next door was playing this song when I woke up the day my first mid-terms had to start. Why the hell it’s only Dads who want their names big when Moms have no issues with their names. Unnecessary stress on us by over-ambitious Dads, and why this guy had to play this song damn first thing in the morning!
*************************************
“You may start now,” one butcherous voice announced during Econ exam in the exam centre and all of us promptly came into action like trained machines.
I was quite good at Economics (at least I used to think so) and all these 3 weeks in Economics class, I had felt me a great Economist, the Manmohan Singh and Montek Singh Ahluwalia kind, you know, so this exam should me a cakewalk for me.
“What are you doing here Anand? Go and do some research on recession-proof Economic models in the States. That’s the best place for you…Don’t waste your precious talent here. And yes, don’t forget to go and meet Montek Singh Ahluwalia in term break discussing new CST/GST policy for India with him” I thought while writing my name, PGId, Section on the Economics answer sheet.
Tuple was sitting diagonally right to me not having any butterfly clip tying her hair today. She was looking a fairy in her open hair!
“All the best,” I thumbed up guessing she was looking at me. And all she reacted was by looking back at her answer sheet. God, why I feel she’s always looking at me!
It was a 2 hour paper, I strategized to finish it in some 40-45 minutes and go back to prepare for the evening Marketing exam, and opened the question paper.
In all these were three questions with 10 marks numerical each and I started solving with first question.
1st and 2nd question had TR, TC, MR, MC given…I had to calculate elasticity “n” and then draw some snail-alike curves such as economies of scale, economies of scope, average fixed cost, average variable cost etc. etc. etc.
“It’s TR=TC (1+ 1/n)..no…no”
“It should be MR=MC (1+1/n)…no…no”
“Probably it is TR=TC/(1+n)…no…no”
“Guess it is MR=MC/(1+1/n)…no…no,” I thought. I was damn confused!
Head had started spinning…I had forgotten the formulae to solve 2 fucking 10 mark questions.
Sweat on forehead was quite apparent…already had been to drink water thrice…and if I go again, butcher invigilator will make butter chicken of mine and eat inside the exam centre only!
“Anand, relax! Remember you are a great Economist. You have to do it. What would you tell Manmohan ji otherwise?” God knows what all I was talking to myself.
Finally, I counted Om Namah Shivay once, and as these were 3 words, I chose 3rd equation and solved 2 numericals of 10 marks each and went to drink water fourth time!
“Calculate producer surplus of the new market Walmart is entering,” read the 3rd question, which had given some etta, betta, theta, some equations, some random numbers and God knows what.
“What the hell is this Producer Surplus! I never read it,” guess I was the only one sweating in this damn cold air-conditioned basket ball court where our exam was being held!
“What a misery! I can’t even call Manmohan ji or Montek Singh Ahluwalia at this moment” I thought and started laughing. What else to do, only God knew what all I was thinking. What’s happening to me!
Everyone in the room was busy scratching their answer sheets and all I was doing was laughing.
I closed my eyes, chanted Om Namha shivay in closed eyes, opened my eyes, and picked first 5 maths numbers and first 2 equations I saw on opening my eyes.
“I would solve this numerical with only these numbers,” I told myself. If this question was stubborn to be tough, even I was stubborn to solve it with my chosen numbers and equations. Who knows it increases Wal-Mart’s producer-surplus in new market!
I managed to finish this question in next 3 minutes and winded up the answer sheet.
“Sir, answer sheet!” I offered my answer sheet to the butcher when it were just 30 minutes into the exam.
Butcher surprisingly looked at me as if I am giving him my marriage card invitation with his daughter but very generously accepted it, and I ran away before he finally made my butter chicken in exam centre!
**********************************************
“Hey mid-term grades are out. I got an A+” I excitingly told Tuple when met her outside the cafeteria. I was so happy wished could take her hand in my hands, but alas, desires are only desires!
“What did you get?” I curiously asked when she was merely gazing at a corner and tapping her fingers on table next to her.
No reply from her side!
“Even Swami and Veenugopal in our study group got A+. Our study group is the best study group,” I super-excitingly told Tuple, and had to forcefully bring my hands back from almost half-way when they were already on their way out to Tuple’s hands.
“So you A or A+ Miss Tuple,” I winked.
“D,” only alphabet she uttered and again starting gazing at some corner.
I was anyways wanting for an opportunity, and now immediately grabbed her hand in my hands. Nothing could be a safer moment than this!
Man! What a great moment it was…So here was Tuple who was D standing in front of Anand Malhotra A+…
“Now she would marry me,” I drooled. After months had got some good news.
“God, should have given her E or may be even F,” I complained to God. Greed has no limits dude!
“Hey, must be evaluation problem, we would file for re-evaluation or may be, we would study even harder for final terms. And I won’t listen to you now anymore, now we would study together all the times…All the times,” I leveraged the market opportunity like a domain-expert marketer repeating “all the times” making double-quotes in air twice just to make sure she didn’t have something else going on in her mind.
Tuple sounded well-entrapped. Even the idea of studying with Tuple "all the time" was arousing butterflies in my stomach...
I wiped her face expecting their would be some tears. Damn, there was none! Why this girl doesn’t cry, I had missed yet another chance of emotional soap opera with Tuple!
May be next time! I cursed myself for giving her this re-evaluation idea!
Tuple was tapping her fingers on the table and then the sound of tapping increased…increased…increased unless I realized it was my “Papa Kehte Hain” quadie knocking at my door making me wake up as had told him the previous night.
I woke up but still had that great feeling of Tuple always studying with me…all the time…and jumped off the day to hug “Papa kehte hain” quadie.
**********************************************************************8
“Hey mid-term grades are out. I got an A+,” Tuple told jumping and holding my arm in her both hands when she met me outside the cafeteria.
Don’t know why these girls have to jump when they are happy! And, does she want to tell me that our mid-term grades are out or that she has got an A+. You know these girls-say something else and mean something else!
“What did you get?” Tuple asked, she was still jumping.
No reply from my side!
I looked all around, many more girls were jumping in different parts of the hall, while guys had both their feet touching the ground like me.
“Even Swami and Veenugopal in our study group got A+. Our study group is the best study group,” Tuple excitedly told. This girl has got some energy, jumping for last 5 minutes.
“So you A or A+ Mr. Anand,” Tuple winked.
Since the time I have learnt alphabets, first time I wished E to come before A!
“E,” only alphabet I uttered and went back to gaze at some corner. My fingers were still tapping on the table next to me.
Jumping to the halt and hands off the arm!
“Oh aren’t we getting late for our Econ class? Let me grab some sandwich, see you in the class,” Tuple monotonously told and went off the scene. Girls in other corners had also stopped jumping and went for their sandwiches.
A, B, C, D were the villains between me and Tuple. Wished could change alphabets taught to us in kindergarten to E,D,C,B,A,G,H and so on…
Tuple won’t marry me now...
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment